it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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