Having a random hookup so left but love u
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
