we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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