The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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