it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
