I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
