Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
