I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
