yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
