i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
