Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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