his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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