i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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