did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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