Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
