just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
