They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
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