so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
