Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
