whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
