i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
