I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
