Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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