how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
