Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
