I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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