dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
the condom got lost in my hair
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
