So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
