I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize