I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
my being single is dangerous.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
