is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
