tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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