I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
