i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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