and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Randomize
