The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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