I'm really into asian looking animals
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
