whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
