After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
