Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
