Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
