walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
