That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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