Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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