"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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