I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
its liver damage thursday
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
