We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
