Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
