would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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