you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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